


The Price of War

by Night_Panther_13



Category: Hamilton - Miranda, Original Work
Genre: Historical Inaccuracy, Kid Fic, Minor Violence, Sad with a Happy Ending, writer anthony
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-23
Updated: 2018-03-23
Packaged: 2019-04-07 03:02:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14071506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Night_Panther_13/pseuds/Night_Panther_13
Summary: This is a short historical fiction that is completely inaccurate. I did research beforehand and then decided nah I'm going to just write a really bad short thing cause why not. I have Lin Manuel Miranda and Anthony Ramos in a a historical au and than Hamilton characters. (I really just love Lin and Anthony and just wondered how they would fit into Hamilton time era parts of them are based on the characters they played but yeah) What happens when Sophia falls in love with an American soldier? What happens to her lover and what will her fiancee do about it?





	1. The Battle for Her Heart

I woke up happy and refreshed. I turned to face Anthony besides me who was still dreaming. I wondered how he could sleep with his coat still on, but I would never know.  
“Hey,” I whispered still watching him. “Wake up. I don’t want us to get caught. You know John will be home in two days and will remain a fortnight. You being here is risky.” Anthony’s eyes fluttered open as he listened. He enclosed his arms around me and smiled.  
“That means we only have two days until we are separated for those longs two weeks,” He replied just as softly. “It’s not like anything happened. You are not yet married to me. WIth your fiance hanging about I find our marriage delaying ever longer.”  
“I wish I could write to my father but you know the British post office manager would never let me do that without him reading it first,” I sighed. “He knows if General John were to have his fiance leave him for a patriot lieutenant the army would be in shame and my money wouldn’t be his.” Anthony nodded along, but was gazing more at my lips. I knew he no longer cared to hear the reason I had to explain every time he asked me to run away with him. He knew the speech by heart. I also felt stupid saying it, I too just wanted to remain in this moment with him. As I nuzzled against him his breath caught short.  
“Two days you said,” He spoke shock in his voice. “I would say John would just shoot me if he found me.”  
“That is my intention you tramp,” A cold voice replied. “Sophia please come here darling. I really must talk with you if this is what happens when I am gone. I will more frequently visit if you are so lonely.”  
“Don’t move away from me,” Anthony whispered in my ear. “Don’t let him get a clear shot.” I faced John noticing him gripping his pistol. His lip quivered in anger and knuckles were white and his fists shaking. He was furious and hurt and I couldn’t care less for him. My mind was sluggish, if Anthony or I didn’t make a choice soon I would be pulled away or John would get closer and shoot him anyway. His anger was so strong that maybe I too would be killed. So I screamed bloody murder hoping to alert anyone and everyone. Pounding steps in the hallway told me the help were coming to my aid. John wasn’t dim and thought quickly.  
“Let go of my fiance!” John said channeling his anger. The butler entered the room and gasped. “Stop holding her hostage!” The butler moved quick and tried to pry me away, but was confused as it clearly became known that I was clinging to Anthony.  
“Drop the gun!” I cried forcing myself to sound hysterical. “Don’t shoot me! Don’t shoot him!” I had made the right choice for John looked concerned and unloaded the pistol and set it on the dresser. He went to me pulling me into his arms trying to sooth me. I caught the smallest glimpse of Anthony picking up his boots and tearing down the hallway to the front door. No one moved to stop him. I calmed myself and broke away from John.  
In the evening John sat next to me in the sitting room. He seemed disturbed.  
“What is it darling?” I asked. I was embroidering a delicate handkerchief.  
“Who was that man this morning?” John asked. “Why did you protect him so? Have I not cared for you and given you everything you want? I am an honest, wealthy, and I believe to be handsome. What do poor scum like him have to cause such a scene.”  
“You did nothing wrong,” I said blushing. “I don’t know how it happened I never met him before in my life. He had climbed in my window and forced me to kiss him moments before you arrived. He threatened me and I was scared.” Oh how I lied. I wished to please John but my heart had never been his. He courted me and I was engaged to him less than a year ago. I only had consented to it because I was scared of becoming an old maid. A meer two months after being betrothed I found myself bored of sitting only in my house my father had bought for me and my british husband to be. I went into town and watched as the minutemen rode and ran through the streets to a nearby field. The lieutenant was riding a stallion following the group and was smiling. I never saw someone so beautiful being so brave. I did all the small flirty things you are taught to do. I caught a number of gazes and a few of the soldiers and leaders around him pointed me out. At last I met his eye and in that brief moment I knew he was mine. The next second he was gone riding into battle. The rest of the month my dull fiance was gone in duty away from home and I was given the perfect opportunity to win over my Anthony despite what he would risk. Falling in love with a British officer’s wife to be wasn’t a thing many would do. But I could still find no escape of the engagement and had no way to tell my father. How could I now lie and say I never met this man?  
“Sophia I will protect you,” John murmured. His gray eyes looked so earnest and I felt some remorse for this boy in love with the idea of me. He brushed a pale lock from his face and looked more clearly at me. “Never let that man be near you again.” I nodded dumbly and focused more on my project. The night came and went and came and went. I was like a housewife in the large house I was to become a mother in. In support of the Americans I had quit tea and insisted that the home’s lack of it was because I really enjoyed coffee and tea made me ill. I could do such with a few British ideas for me to boycott, but I had to buy the sugar and papers to make it appear as if I was a normal British lady. I was enjoying a chat with Mrs. Taylor when John made an appearance in full uniform. Mrs.Taylor admired it and spoke of her wishing her husband to return again soon as well. I agreed it was delightful to have John again and the conversation carried us to early night. She left with well wishes. I dressed in my pale white satin nightgown when knocking came upon my chamber door. I opened it to find John looking rather handsome in his night apparel.  
“Sophia I don’t wish to frighten you but I can’t keep that bastard out of my mind,” He said wringing his hands. “I want to stay with you tonight to insure he won’t appear again. Nothing more than sleeping I promise, but just to grant me peace of mind.” I agreed and we went to sleep. I moved as far away from him and as close to the edge of the bed as I could. I couldn’t bare to see, hear, and smell him when I had dedicated that spot to my beloved.  
The next afternoon John departed leaving me with many kisses that were like poison in my mouth. I waited for night and retired to my room earlier than usual. I unlatched the window and read in my plush chair. Rustling from under my windowsill set my soul aflame. I ran to the window to and Anthony pulled himself up to face me from the other side. He was close enough that our noses were almost touching. I moved back so he could pull himself up and through the open window.  
“You are so lucky I’m stationed in a nearby town,” Anthony laughed. His dark eyes smiling and his freckle covered nose crinkled up. He took up my hand and spun me around. “Oh, don’t you just look beautiful.”  
“Don’t make me blush,” I shyly smiled. He drew me in closer and set his hands around my waist. We swayed in a simple made up dance.  
“Do you want to know something funny darling,” Anthony chatted. “I warn you it is a bit gruesome, but I know you won’t mind.”  
“Whatever is it?” I asked.  
“I came this close to expiring because of a bayonet yesterday,” Anthony solemnly said. He smiled for my sake but I was more intrigued about what happened. “Some knucklehead footsoldier thought he knew enough to sell information to the British. Well he clearly wasn’t getting paid enough for information they didn’t need. He was going to kill Lieutenant Lin, Burr, and me. Well the poor fool choice me first. I was in the woods diggin up a small supply of hidden bullets when he planned to stab me. He mustn’t have noticed Lin a few yards away. He got the tip five inches away from my back when Lin ran screaming through and pushed him away. We tussled a bit, giving me a decent scratch before we manage to drag him back to the camp where he is to be tried.”  
“I don’t see how that is funny Anthony,” I said stubbornly. “You could have died.”  
“That’s the funny thing,” Anthony said now walking about the room. “The poor bastard wanted to kill me but will surely be sentenced to death.”  
“Tad morbid don’t you think?” I giggled. “Now I want to see this scratch and deal with any infection. Those camps are all awfully filthy.” Anthony removed his coat and shirt to expose a long cut across the back of his shoulders. I moved over to my vanity and poured the water from a pitcher over a towel. I moved then back to Anthony washed the cut. I grabbed a small amount of alcohol to pour over the concerning wound.  
“Ahhh!” Anthony hissed. “Damn that is painful.”  
“I’m sorry, but it is now clean,”I said apologetically as I wrapped the wound. He flinched as I wound the long cloth around his cut. “Is that too tight?”  
“No, just it stings still,” He flinched. His eyes were watering now. I unwound the bandage and rinsed it with warm water. He soon relaxed and I finished with the bandages. He then hugged me in gratitude. He lay down on the bed and made himself comfortable propping up pillows and such. I sat next to him as he talked about his companions and the war. My life seems very boring compared to the bloodshed and bravery he faces. Once or twice we went silent on hearing footsteps of the hired help outside my door. I eventually fell asleep in his bare arms. He ran his fingers through his dark curly hair wondering if life could continue like this.  
A month later Anthony came tapping on my window. His smiling face was too much to bare. I told him to leave for John was home. He was too cute and too pretty for me to turn away. He climbed through the window and tripped over his own feet. It would have been funny had it not caused such a noise as to summon John. He burst into my room to find Anthony there.  
“Yet another scoundrel!” John cried. Not remembering Anthony’s face. “Thank goodness I’m here to protect the most beautiful girl in all of the British colonies.” I was terrified. Not by his compliment because the way people stared in town I knew I must be pretty some way or another, but I was scared for my beloved. “I will make sure you pay for this you heathen.”  
“Sir get away from me!” Anthony yelled.  
“Don’t tell me what to do in my own home!” John shot back. John was the larger man and punched Anthony roughly, efficiently knocking him out. I gasped and called for the butler but soon the two men carried Anthony out despite my arguments. I followed at a distance as he was dragged to the Brown family’s yard. The large plantation had a pillory were slaves were often mocked and whipped. I had found the thing unbearable and would care for the poor person in it’s hold. Anthony began to stir and struggle in the men’s grasp. He spit, shouted, and fought, but couldn’t win. A small crowd formed around him to watch the lashing. I begged John to let him be. John was an aggressive man and wouldn't back down. He was given a whip from Mr.Brown and the crowd showed enthusiasm. Anthony’s back was made bare and you could see the muscles tense up after each lashing. Ten marks were made upon his tan back before I fought my way to the front. I could see the marks being made across the scar from his last violent encounter. The crack sounded and Anthony cried out to meet it.  
“John stop this right now or I leave tonight!” I screamed over the noise. He halted for a moment. “I will run away! I don’t know where, but I will not stay near you a moment longer if you move that whip again!” My anger matched his and he handed the lash to Mr. Brown to continue the twenty lashes. My complaints and threats stopped the punishment at fifteen. Anthony was left there half hanging by his wrists. I unlatched the cuffs and his head fell unto my lap. He was panting and drenched in sweat. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a person running towards me. It was Anthony’s comrade Lin. He called over his shoulder for Mr. Burr and the two thanked me and carried Anthony off. I walked home angry as John begged me to stay.  
“Darling I know you to be a pacifist but that man threatened our relationship and your life,” John argued. “You don’t know the things he would have done to you. We should be married soon so I may have the money to protect you from something like this.”  
“John I will never marry you!” I boiled. “I am packing my things and going to my father. He will claim back my home and you will never see me again.”  
“Sophia be sensible!” John growled. I now was stomping off into my room to grab a few of my belongings. “I dare say you won’t leave this room until you have calmed down!” John slammed the door and I heard the tumblers lock. I helplessly pounded my fists against the door crying. I went to my window on a second thought and threw it open. I tossed my legs over the side and tore away from the house. Now John was a clever man and had come around the outside with a bolt for the window. Seeing me escape he ran to me. He wrapped his arms around me in an abrasive grip and spoke soothingly. I fought and cried and kicked until he had taken me to the sitting room and I was too wore out to do much.  
“Listen to me love,” John begged. “I don’t know what sparked this and I have done everything in my power to please you. Tell me what I can do to make you stay?”  
“I don’t know,” I mumbled. “I don’t know I don’t know. I want to go to bed and think about it.”  
“I will allow that, but I must make you aware that I am having a man stand out front in case you feel the need to run away.”  
“Goodnight.” I went to my room and plopped down on the bed. I sat and stared at the ceiling contemplating. I don’t know how long I sat like that but when I looked out the window it was a dark purple sky. I moved over to my drawing desk and began to write on a scrap of parchment. I was once again drafting my letter to my father asking for his assistance. I tended to write of all my concerns about John’s actions, but this time I added information about how I needed to be with Anthony and how instead of having rumours be spread about me his endured such torture. I found the letter not quite agreeable. I was startled when in the silence of my thoughts I heard a small tapping upon the glass. I ran to the window to find a rather uncomfortable looking Anthony hidden in the flower bed behind a bush. He wasn’t really knocking on the glass but, jostling the bolt as he tried to pick the lock. I unlocked the window from the inside and in a few minutes the outdoor lock was cracked. He climbed through the window into my room and began to pace.  
“Oh Anthony I am so sorry,” I began to lament. “I couldn’t think in that moment. You are probably in pain. I have some balm I tend to give to the poor slaves that get lashes over twenty but for you I would give you all the balm I have. John is cruel oh so cruel. Here you may put this on the marks.” I handed him the ointment and he grabbed my fretful hands in his soft, larger, and slightly darker hands. I looked up into his big brown puppy eyes hoping he could see how much I loved him. But his face seemed distracted and didn’t show the smile I loved. Though he too seemed to convey the message that he would never let me go. “What is it love?”  
“I’m being sent to south Pennsylvania,” Anthony said plainly. “General Washington sent note that he wanted me there for one battle. A losing battle. I am needed for one of their leaders is dead. I won’t be here to keep you safe and from the hatred I see growing in general John here I fear for you.”  
“Why do you fear for me?” I said softly. “I am scared that you will not be at my side. You could perish and I would never know.”  
“To die is nothing,” He said now sitting on the edge of the bed. “Living is harder. To live a horrible life is everything bad. I can picture such a nightmare. You are no longer beautiful inside and out. Underneath the petticoats you are beaten and bruised from his temper. Your hair is thin and torn from lack of nutritious. Circles are under your eyes from lack of sleep. You are tense and stern and growl. Your gorgeous green eyes would be that of a British snake. Three brats cling to your skirt. They scream and cry and spit at you. They demand a governess and hate you for they have hateful British blood. You cannot love these children, although you try. Your husband becomes fat during this. He tends to drink and it feeds his anger. He has his mistresses and leaves you emotionally void. Now that is why I fear for you. A life with him is not a life. Now for me a life with you married is terrifying, not only because you will be ruined, but because I would not survive without you. I would fall ill and die.  
“Oh no dear I could never do those things,” I pouted. “What things can you see if I am to escape and be with you.”  
“I had hoped you would ask,” Anthony now smiled. His freckled face lit up and he spun me about as he talked cheerfully. “I see us happy in this house together. I see you only growing more beautiful as we grow old together. I see a four children that smile and play and are as gorgeous as you and I. I see you healthy and happy. You teach these children to play piano and speak French. I see myself teaching our little girl to dance. I see even farther into our future a darling young lady getting married herself and dancing so graceful and being so smart. I see a son so talented he blew us all away with his knowledge. I later see you with silver hair looking more beautiful than anything I had ever seen. I want to fight in this war so we can have that.” He held me close and we locked lips. I knew that the details may be off, but I too wanted this wonderland. “I must be going now Sophia. To stay here would be my head.”  
“Anthony I think I might have found a way for us to be happy!” I squealed. I ran to my desk and grabbed an envelope. It was one of my better drafts of a letter to my father. It had described Anthony’s good deeds in detail. I added quickly about the lashing he had taken and signed the letter folding it up. I handed it to Anthony. “Take this to my father. Without a post officer no one can stop him getting this message. He is in south Pennsylvania. Find this address and save me from your nightmare darling.” Anthony grabbed the envelop and looked at it closely like he couldn’t believe was he was told. His kissed the parchment and turned to kiss my forehead.  
“Sophia I will travel faster than any man has ever gone,” Anthony laughed. “Why Lieutenant Lin will barely have a second to sleep before I insist we continue on our way.” He hugged me as his forearms slid on the outer side of my arm and followed around to the small of my back. He had a cat like smile on his face. He kept nodding his head back and forth waiting for my consent for a kiss. He puffed out his cheeks showing off his face peppered with freckles. I played koi and he grew annoyed with my childish tactics. “You know I have to leave really soon and won’t be back for weeks.”  
“Oh you tease,” I chided and brushed my lips against his to satisfy his wants. I became distinctly aware of our situation and began to convince him to leave. He put up a little fight but knew I was right in the end. I made sure he remembered the soothing cream for his very bruised back. He gracefully fell out the window headfirst and began quietly swearing to the other side of the lawn hoping he wouldn’t be caught. I watched him scurry off out of my field of vision. A sharp rapping on the door brought me to reality.  
“Whom is it?” I asked.  
“It’s me darling,” John softly said. “I noticed the light coming from underneath your door. I thought you had gone to bed, but now I’m worried you were just sick. Are you alright?”  
“Yes I’m fine,” I said. I began to pace without thinking.  
“You sound ill,” He replied. “May you open the door please? I really should check on you.” He rattled the doorknob a bit to emphasize his point. I unlocked the door unhappily and he immediately entered the room hugging onto me. He put the back of his hand against my forehead checking for fever and I gently pushed him away.  
“I am not sick,” I commented. He gave a small pout and checked for fever again.  
“You feel a bit warm maybe you should go to sleep,” He added.  
“Gladly,” I said waving him to the door. He took me by the arm and awkwardly tucked me into the covers. I raised my eyebrow and stared as he sat atop the quilt and wrapped his arm around me. I climbed out of the bed and glared at him.  
“Sir this is highly inappropriate,” I stuttered.  
“Sophia I need to speak with you,” He continued. “We are to be married in two months time. I know that was an unclassy move of mine, but I am eager to be your husband.”  
“I’m flattered,” I replied sharply.  
“I want our children to grow up proud of what we created,” He said gesturing to the whole house. My father’s house for me, not John’s he did nothing to create this home. I did. “I can see our little girl already. She would be a pretty pale blonde thing. Soft green eyes and a smooth milky complexion. Stick straight hair and small, full grown as tall as this.” He put his hand out to a height that was between my elbow and shoulder. “Oh such a pretty and polite thing. Can’t you envision the future here.”  
“Where is this child’s appearance coming from?” I asked annoyed. “We are both well over the height you said. If anything our child will be tall. I would also remark that if she is to have my green eyes they are not soft. I myself wish they were but, alas they are like fire.”  
“So it isn’t quite exact,” He shrugged. “I just find that a child would look better with these details.”  
“I am tired please go,” I said almost hurt. No I truly was hurt. It was one thing to assume I was already claimed as a wife with no choice whatsoever, but another to say how I would be prettier. As he shuffled into the hall I locked my door behind him. I had only become engaged to him because my younger sister had been engaged and my older sister married. I felt my time drip down the drain and panicked. I wanted so badly to stop the screaming in my head. I did for a short time but, I soon realized I needed to find someone who would care for me more than just financially.  



	2. The Battle left Scars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Sophia ever break free of John's grasp or will she suffer an awful fate? What will happen to her love, Anthony?

John was with me for the next to weeks planning our wedding. Most of the guests were to be of my family considering his were in Britain. The church was arranged and summer flowers were to decorating the yard for a decent ball in my home. Our home. Our. Oh I hated saying that. With every arrangement I hoped my father would be receiving my letter through Anthony. Finally came the day I bought the dress. It was beautiful. I cried as I looked in the long mirror at the shop. It was pearl white with sleeves that ended at my elbow with matching pearl necklace and gloves. The veil was gorgeous and so perfectly complimented the dress. It hit me so suddenly, I wasn’t a child any longer. My Anthony must not have been able to send the letter in time. My father wouldn’t be there. My wedding day was in a week and a half. He must have left his home early to be here before the wedding. I would have to be a loving wife to a man I couldn’t love. If Anthony were to return alive I would have to inform him I must stop seeing him ever again. I would break all affection for this dream like daring boy. I left the store still blotting my eyes. A figure came up to me.  
“Madame!” He called. “Madame Sophia please stop for a moment!”  
“Who are you sir?” I asked the man. He had his dark and very curly fluffy hair tied up and stubble carefully kept to distinguish his jawline. His grin covered his whole face. He was tall and built like a soldier. In fact he had on a revolutionary uniform. Another important fact is he was clearly French. His speech and manner, French.  
“Je m'appelle Lafayette,” He drawled. He motioned for someone else to come over with his hand. “His name is Hercules Mulligan. We ‘ave been told to deliver a message for you.” The other man Mulligan arrived next to Lafayette. He was darker and wider than the former, but also looked happier. He had clean cut hair and very warm eyes. Lafayette explained that he was a Irishman brought to America. If I had guessed I would have thought him a proud New Yorker through and through. He also made it known that he would have to move our conversation somewhere private because Hercules was a Patriot spy and we can’t blow his cover. I agreed and the two directed me to a nearby store basement that was devoid of people.  
“Word travels fast through the soldiers’ lines,” Hercules said very relaxed. “I think I have got some interesting news for you. This is coming from Mr.Laurens. He says your father is coming here early to stop the wedding. Anthony didn’t say who is was in relations to you but only that you want an out and are being held here against your will. He delivered your message and had to leave quickly. Your father will be here in two days tops.” I hugged these strange soldiers.  
“Two days you said?” I asked for confirmation.  
“Only two days mademoiselle,” Lafayette smiled. “We must be going now, but keep faith darling. From what I hear you have Laurens wrapped around your finger and I would be so sad to see him heartbroken.” He waved me goodbye and wished me luck as Hercules pulled him out the door. I was so excited when I got home that I acted like a soon to be married bride for the first time.  
It was a quiet dinner two nights later. I was growing worried something had come up with my father and he wouldn’t come to my rescue at all. John held my hand over the table and it was growing uncomfortably silent. When I heard knocking on the door I almost squealed. I jumped out of my chair and my skirt was still twirling about me as I pulled open the door. My tall father stood in the door frame looking flustered.  
“Good evening darling I hope I didn’t catch you at a poor time,” He said walking into the hallway. “It’s nice to see you kept my summer home in nice shape. I am happy to know you have made it your own though.” I stopped him short before he could enter the dining room.  
“Father did you happen to receive a letter of mine finally?” I asked. “I have sent so many but never have I received a response. I haven’t forgotten you.”  
“I had wondered why the only letter I received was your wedding invitation,” He said. “Then a young gentleman rather nervously handed me a letter in your very unique writing. He confirmed a few points then disappeared into the night. I found the situation very odd and decided I must see what the matter was myself.” He moved to head into the room again.  
“Don’t say anything to John yet Father,” I commanded. “He is so narrow minded he can hardly think I don’t have an ounce of affection towards him. He just thinks I’m an adventurous little girl who is playing koi with him. He honestly can’t see how trapping me in this town is wrong. I’m going mad here. I can’t be his because my heart has been given to another.”  
“I’m disappointed Sophia,” He said quickly. “When you rushed into this engagement I told you that you must learn to love him. I see you haven’t. How am I to know you love this other man? How do I know this man loves you?”  
“You are the only honorable answer to my problem,” I sternly told. “I do not wish to run away, but I can have it arranged. I can send word more easily to my love and I have not a doubt in my mind he will steal me away. I haven’t already done this for the sake of the family name.” My father gently set his hand on my shoulder and went to greet my fiance. The two men shook hands and the help and I cleared the table.  
“Sir what brings you so early?” John asked good naturedly.  
“I just wanted to be with my daughter a bit before she becomes a wife,” My father replied. “My wife is coming up here in a few days, but I was so excited I just had to leave earlier. You know her youngest sister will also be married this summer and it will be so strange for both of them to be away.”  
“I see,” John replied. “Though you shouldn’t worry about your Sophia. It couldn’t have been too long ago I defended her from an intruder breaking into her window. He was well whipped like a slave.”  
“That is good to know criminals are being punished,” The older replied. I looked at my father with such a sadness in my eyes that if he were to be confused by the meaning I was hopeless. He didn’t catch on. I passed him quickly to say it clearly.  
“He whipped my Anthony,” I whispered hurriedly. I kept moving as to not allude to John that my father was here to help me. Though I couldn’t tell myself if my father would anytime soon. I waited patiently through their small talk. My thoughts were fixed on Anthony.  
“Sophia you seem tense,” John commented.  
“I am,” I replied. BEfore I knew it all my thoughts tumbled out of my mouth. “I’m worried about Anthony. If he is shot by a British soldier it may take weeks before I am even made aware. Oh he scares me so. I wish his stupid freckled face was here with me instead of risking his life on the battlelines.” I went red in the face and held my breath.  
“I wasn’t aware your brother was a patriot,” John stuttered. “I was well convinced his name was Edward and he had no freckles.”  
“Anthony isn’t my brother,” I whispered terrified. John looked between me and my father confused.  
“Sophia you must be tired,” My father helped. “Go to sleep.” I got up instantly and kissed his cheek. I then floated to my room. I rushed to my desk and drafted another love letter to Anthony. It began with what I had done and ended with how much I missed him. I laid down in my cold sheets and was overcome by tiredness.  
The next morning I awoke to the sun shining through my window. I got up and wandered into my sitting room. My father sat a book in hand.  
“Convince me you love this Anthony and I will call the whole ordeal off and take all the backlash,” He said calmly. I was overcome with emotions. I gave out a sputtering sound. “I am very conflicted on this matter already, but I can clearly see how upset you are here. Justify your unhappiness and I will support you completely.”  
“Anthony has done so much for me,” I started. “He was nearly shot by John! He took a whipping instead of passing it off on me and creating a scandal. He has been a support and someone to talk to for a very long time now. The moment I saw him in that militia I knew I was hopelessly in love. He is fighting for my freedom. Both my country’s and from all the men John has around the town keeping me from sending word to you that he is living here not just visiting. That is a true scandal.”  
“I can clearly see this Anthony loves you,” My father leaned forwards. “What proof do you have that shows he isn’t some fleeting attraction. I need to know you will settle down and not just bounce from each suitor.”  
“I-I,” I stuttered. I couldn’t think of anything. I knew Anthony could ramble lists about what he loved about me and what I have done for him, but nothing came to mind. “I am willing to risk everything for him. My life, reputation, and wealth. I don’t even need him to love me as much as I do him. He is my one source of happiness. I can see the future he has painted. I see my house glowing with happiness. I see my child with dark curls singing and laughing. I see him. I look into those hazel eyes and that smile, I’m lost.” I stopped. I thought about Anthony’s arms wrapped around and how safe I felt. I must have shown it by my facial features.  
“Leave it to me Sophia,” He assured. I was beaming as I heard John wake up. Father told me to go out in town and get a few unnecessary items as he told John a fake reasoning for breaking the engagement. I grabbed my cape and stopped for a second. I turned to the drawing room and unlocked the cabinet. I reached around on the top shelf and found what I was looking for. The ornate pistol that was John’s. I shoved it in the pocket of my dress’ skirt. I wouldn’t risk another outburst with it in my house. I walked out into the crisp morning air walking to the carriage ready for me. I rode into town and wandered about. I stopped to look at some nice fruit.  
“Miss Sophia?” a voice asked. “That is your name right?” I spun around to see Mr. Burr.  
“Yes Mr. Burr,” I said cheerily. “It’s a pleasure to see you again.”  
“I heard through Lafayette that your engagement is being called off,” He chatted. “Which must be good news since you and Mr. Laurens will be a much better suited couple I hear.”  
“Yes,” I smiled. “What about you? What is new within your own life and don’t say war.”  
“Well I too am engaged,” He grinned. “To a girl named Theodosia.” I congratulated him and parted ways. I was far too excited to continue in town and made my journey home. As I arrived on the lawn I noticed several redcoats moving in and out of the house. I got out of the carriage and walked up to one of them.  
“What is this all about?” I demanded.  
“Miss I don’t know who you may be but, this man has tried to deny housing of a British officer. It got quite heated and he called for backup. An arrangement was made and the gentleman was calmed down with only minor fines. From what I hear the father is just upset that his daughter is marrying Officer John without his blessing. Poor fool.”  
“I am not marrying that scum,” I cried. “Move out of my way.” He was so stunned that he let me pass by without another word. I bunched some of my skirt in my fists and pushed passed two other men. My father was glaring at John as he was practically restrained in his armchair. John stood next to one of his men and was laughing with his eyes. I was enraged and flew at the evil man pummeling my fists unto him. He shouted and fell as I screamed at him angrily. His companion and father restrained me but, I fought as well as I could in my restricting clothes.  
“Sophia I have had enough of this nonsense,” John ordered. He spat in my general direction. “I have had enough of your silly games. I know it is caused by the stress of soon being married. Once we are together this won’t happen anymore. I will make sure of it. I have fought too hard for you to reject me like this. I know you love me and yet you struggle. Stop this.”  
“I refuse to marry you and my father gives no blessing,” I spat equally indignant. “You have no way to legally marry me. Find another pretty girl because you made a mistake with me. I am too much a real human to be controlled any longer and too clever to remain with you. Take this filthy cheap ring.” I tore the thin band from my finger and launched it at him. I dug into my pocket and feeling around the pistol I found the plain ring Anthony gave to keep him in my mind always. It was just a gold circlet and in no way an engagement ring but it fit my purpose. I put it in the other ring’s spot and flashed it in John’s face.  
“Shallow slut,” He growled. “I too see I can never be with you. You have found some pretty boy to replace me. Probably a poor thing by the look of it. Well when he is starving you will see how ugly he will look and regret ever throwing out one of the handsomest British Officers to exist. I hope you at least will be committed to him.” He seized my arm and was going to slap me but I got to him and kicked him in the crown jewels. He growled in pain and had his men escort him far away from my home. I was faint and fell asleep again in my room.  
A month passed with nothing to do but talk with father and write letters to inform all those invited to my wedding of the situation. It was a long and boring process. My mother and father had joined me for a fortnight and left. Soon the month turned to several and I gathered letters from Anthony and his whereabouts. He visited every few months, his last visit being in June. The war had ended and I joined in the celebrations. I cheered as the British soldiers were marched out of town. It was a joyous occasion. I held a beautiful dinner for all of my friends in town. Not excluding the ones on the British side. I believe they were just as happy to have stopped the fighting and bloodshed at least. I enjoyed the laughter, food, and peace. The next day I was in the sitting room when a loud pounding was on my door. I jumped out of my chair startled. I opened the heavy door unto a soldier. It was Mr.Burr standing there.  
“Miss Sophia can we bring him in here?” He said hurriedly. “Call on a doctor immediately!” I had only a second to think before Burr and another man carried in a bleeding crying Anthony. One moment of horror and I was running to the driver. I quickly told him to get Dr. Jones here immediately. He quickly got the cabby ready and whipped the horse quickly. I ran back into the house. I followed the cries to the guest room. One of the servants had laid out a rugged blanket that had never been used. I watched in horror as Anthony’s face contorted in pain and tears squeezed from his eyes. His side was covered in his blood and was wrapped poorly with a handkerchief.  
“Mr. Burr what happened?” I said trying to keep my voice calm.  
“He was shot by a retreating redcoat in the field two miles over,” Burr fretfully explained. “It was cowardly. We carried Anthony here because you were the closest. He is bleeding pretty badly. It might even be infected.” I nodded to him biting my lip. I moved over to Anthony and held his hand waiting for the doctor to arrive. He had a tight grip on my hand and his rumbled screams came in waves.  
“Miss Sophia and Mr. Burr I would like to inspect Mr. Laurens.” I moved away from him gently brushing my lips to his strained knuckles. I left the room and was allowed in ten minutes later. It felt like an eternity. The doctor stopped me before I entered the room.  
“I have to tell you something about his condition,” The doctor warned. “He bled out a lot. The wound wasn’t infected but could have been if I didn’t arrive when I did. It hit him right above the hip and I removed it. I bandaged him up tightly. I gave him plenty of medicine for the pain. Now I warn you, he won’t make it to tomorrow night. He is a young man and will not have thought much of his death. Have him plan out what will become of his belongings. If he wishes have him choose a final resting place. I myself am a priest and gave him anointing of the sick as he asked for it. Give him comfort. I am sorry there wasn't better news.” My mind went numb. Anthony can’t die. The war is over, no more lives should be taken. I moved past the doctor and fell to my knees at Anthony’s side. He turned his head and looked at me. I kissed his forehead which was covered in sweat. I undid his ponytail and moved his hair back to make him more comfortable. Around his center a big white bandage was wrapped.  
“I heard what the doctor said Sophia,” Anthony said after a while. “I think I should really tell you all the things that needs to be done.”  
“I-I don’t even know what to do or tell you…” I warbled.  
“Well I was thinking maybe keep me buried by my father’s home in that Church’s cemetery,” He stated sadly. “I actually wrote a will when I joined the army. My mother will have that. There is only one important thing I don’t have on the list. He moved from the bed with much expressed pain. “Don’t yell at me now I know either way I won’t survive long.”  
“Anthony what are you doing?” I cried concerned. “Rest.” I thought he had fallen for a moment then I noticed he was kneeling bracing himself on the edge of a chair. He fished in his pocket careful not to touch his wound. He found a small box and opened it displaying it’s velvet interior. I gasped as he unlatched it. In the center lay a gold ring with a shining diamond gem.  
“Sophia Blanquet will you marry me?” He said with effort. Tears pricked at my eyes. It was partly from joy and partly from seeing my dying Anthony in pain. I came to reality and shook my head happily.  
“Y-yes I will,” I expressed joyfully. “Of course I will Anthony Laurens.” He placed the elegant ring on my finger. I then helped him back into the bed. I saw the bandage had moved exposing bloodstained skin but not the wound itself. I fixed the bandages and arranged the bed better. He looked at me with an emotion I can never perfectly explain. It was love and loss rolled up into physical weariness. He beckoned for me to lay next to him so we may be equals and not me standing over him. I lay on top the covers and made sure to be careful.  
“Let us speak of the future,” He smiled grimly. His voice had lost strength from the effort get back up here. “You always enjoyed our plans for the future. Now you possess the band around your finger that secures it.”  
“The time of dreaming will be abruptly stopped,” I whispered to him. “I cannot lie to you. I cannot pretend for my own happiness. I will never fool myself with you. I love you too much for that.”  
“Shh. Let me pretend. Let me live in glory and false hope,” He said. “I can lie to myself because deep down I know the truth. It entered me with the bullet. Where was I? We will have so many intricate candles, watches, clocks, teapots, and everything your heart wants. We will live as royals since for so long we were prisoners with a hidden relation. Everything is within our reach now. The sky's the limit and the world is ours for the taking.”  
“I don’t want the world,” I said. “I want you to be with me. I want to be your wife and to be here for you. That would be enough.”  
“I will always be with you,” Anthony smiled. His arms wrapped around the outside of mine and guided it into a hug. Then his arms left mine and I felt alone. “That is how I will be. I may only have contact for just a moment but I would never leave you behind.” I must have looked upset because he then wrapped his arms around me again.  
“Please tell me about the future you want,” I said falling into our common routine.  
“I will tell you a different story,” He said dreamily in a voice a level above a whisper. “I will tell you about our amazing daughter. She will come long after I am gone. Now I will be with the stars tomorrow but promise me when I do you will have the sense to marry a good fellow. I am not saying you have to be madly in love with him, but if you do I will hold absolutely nothing against you. I will always love you but you can love more than me. I just want you to be at least reasonably happy. Now through God’s love alone you and your husband will have a child.”  
“I thought you said this is a story of our daughter?” I asked. I was listening to one of his great stories but I knew I had to keep him talking. He was quiet too long. I nudged him. “Stay alive, stay alive.”  
“It is,” He murmured. His voice had grown quieter. “Just you wait a second. You will hold that beautiful baby and everything would be seemingly normal. Well in less than a year you find something odd about that child. She looks a bit like you but, not like her birth father. You would puzzle over it and then realize. The girl has dark curls, hazel eyes, and freckles across her nose and cheeks. Her skin isn’t as perfectly pale as yours and nothing like your pink toned husband. You will know that although I have no way to be her father, I am. Now I can’t say whether you will have more children or not. You decide this part of the story.”  
“I think I won’t,” I stated. “I don’t think I could bear to have a son that wouldn’t hold your legacy.”  
“Very well then,” Anthony shrugged. “You dress your girl in light blue frilly gowns and little blue shoes. You pamper her and yet she seems disinterested in frivolous things. In that way she is like you. You bring her books and she reads like a scholar. One day she is in town with you and an old man and one about your age come up to her. They begin to cry. She calls the old man grandfather by some mistake and looks at the young one like he was a friend. She climbs into the young man’s lap and he lifts her into the arm. She laughs in a way like me. You talk with the gentlemen and the group makes its way to the tiny church. You walk through the gate and come to stop by a whitewashed headstone. The old man leaves flowers, the young one my army medal, and you I hope will leave a piece of your heart. The young man, Lin, will study our child. She had grown quiet. She touches the stone tracing it’s words with her tiny finger. She looks up at you in a way that brings you a pang of joy. She sees me by your side. She knows that the days you dance about the house and then bring her in your arms that it was I who persuaded you to dance. She is gorgeous, smart, and brave beyond anything. I hope she can tell our untold story.”  
“She will have your imagination,” I promised. “It was a lovely story.” He nodded his head.  
“I want you to have a life past my death,” He said solemnly.  
“I want you to live,” I whimpered.  
“I will have to teach you how to say goodbye,” He said in a strange fashion. I rest my head on his shoulder and listened as his shallow breathing became sleep. A songbird was singing unusually in the night.  
I don’t remember falling asleep but I woke up in the early hours of dawn. Anthony was unmoving and I nudged him fearfully. He still didn’t move. I put my ear to his chest fearing the worst. I still heard the tiny thumping sound of his heart. His breathing was labored so I propped the pillows up more so he could gain air easier. This helped and the pounding grew a little louder. I went to the kitchen and the cook came up to me.  
“Miss what is the matter?” She asked.  
“I would like the healthiest most delicious food you can find,” I stated. “I want to see if his health can improve and if not I want him to be happy.”  
“Yes’m,” She said. I chatted with her as I waited for the food to be done. She made two small cake of lemon batter and put poppy seeds in it. She poured syrup on the cakes and fresh fruit on it. Then she cut a wheel of cheese and put some on the plates. She made two cups of tea with honey and set this all on a tray. Before I could take the tray away she stopped me and ran out to the servants’ home. She came back with one white rose.  
“What is that for?” I asked.  
“It’s a charm I know for good health,” SHe explained. She washed the stem of the rose in a bucket of water. Her dark hands methodically pulling out thorns careful to not prick her fingers. “Here you go.”  
“Thank you,” I said gratefully. I handed her two gold coins and took the tray to Anthony. I gently shook him awake.  
“Good morning Sophia,” He croaked.  
“Eat,” I commanded. He took a bite out of his pancake and I ate mine. He drank the tea smiling over his cup at me. I heard one of the servants receive someone in the sitting room.  
“A Mr. Lin has requested to see Mr.Laurens,” She said. I smoothed my skirt and opened the door and led Lin to him. He saluted to his friend.  
“How are your odds?” Lin asked.  
“Nearly impossible,” Anthony frowned. “Less than a day unless I happen to get more blood.”  
“So you need a crazy doctor?” Lin asked smiling now. “One that specializes in blood?”  
“I suppose so,” Anthony whispered.  
“Well I’ve got a mad doctor who happens to have donated blood,” Lin smiled. “He claims he can give a patient more blood. Although I warn you that he says several men have died from this procedure. But some survive and live a full live. Will you risk this?”  
“What?” Anthony stammered.  
“Anthony you have a chance of survival!” I cried. “You either died like you’ve been poisoned or you died slowly with pitying eyes watching you. Please for me take this chance.” I could see him thinking. He was terrified.  
“I have nothing to lose,” He coughed. “Bring this doctor.” LIn hugged his friend and ran out of the house.  
Per the doctor’s instructions we brought Anthony down in the clean cellar and lay out disposable towels to clean the wound and heaven knows what else. Anthony had dark circles under his eyes and looked weaker than this morning. He was laying on a cot. The doctor had demanded everyone leave and so Lin, the servants, and I stayed in the dining room as we waited to hear news of his surgery. An hour later the doctor returned saying that somehow Anthony’s body accepted the blood and he would recover. We celebrated quietly as a medically knocked out Anthony was brought back into the guestroom.  
Our wedding was going to be gorgeous. I already had the dress and decorations. I planned to have white roses everywhere considering that was what all the hired help believe it was what saved Anthony. The guests were dressed beautifully in ornate laces and silks. Songbirds and flutes played music sweeter than sugar.  
“I do,” proclaimed Anthony. His eyes shone bright and his mischievous smile lit up my heart.  
“I do,” I answered. I loved him more than words can say. I knew he was still living the pain of war and would for the rest of his life. I knew I would never understand, but I was willing to be there for him. To be patience and kind and love him. He is a bit broken but so am I. He is my sun and moon and stars above. Death could not claim him away from me.


End file.
